Yesterday afternoon, I attended the memorial of friend and business associate, Stephen George William Parker. Stephen lost a year-long battle with cancer last Sunday. He was only 46. A large group of family and friends gathered to celebrate his life under an ocean pavilion at the St. Augustine Pier. When my day comes, I’d like to be remembered exactly as Stephen was– with warm ocean breezes, good food, cold beverages and a live band, along with a low-key slideshow and a few heartfelt remembrances from family and friends.
For those that didn’t know Steve, he was a kind and generous guy– always quick with a smile and a wry remark, often laced with a little self-depreciating humor. He loved traveling, music, the ocean and his family- including his wife, Cindy; their two daughters; and his three brothers, with whom he was very close.
Like many of us here in North Florida, Stephen was a survivor of the real estate market meltdown. He was Vice President of Parker Associates, a real estate development / and marketing consultation firm where he shared duties with his father David, and older brother, Chris. From Florida, to Costa Rica, to Russia, if you wanted to know what to build upon a certain piece of property; how to position it; price it; and market it; then these guys could tell you. Their endurance through the market turmoil is a testament to their expertise and professionalism. With markets still trying to find their way forward and property changing hands, their insights today are more valuable than ever.
As many from Jacksonville (we, who lived “inside” of one of the nation’s largest real estate bubbles), will tell you, the battle back has been long and arduous. And while Steve and his family have overcome incredible challenges that saw so many other real-estate related companies fail over these past 2.5 years, the merciless serial killer that is cancer came along and buggered up the victory celebration for all of us.
Or perhaps I should say, “almost all of us”. Not for Stephen, himself.
You see, what those closest to Stephen reassured us was that he passed away with absolutely no regrets. He never waited for life to “happen” to him, but always “attacked” it with gusto. If there was a place he wanted to visit, but he didn’t have the funds, he’d find a way to get them. When there didn’t seem to be enough hours in the day for the business at hand, he’d still find a way to get the job done and do so without sacrificing time for his family, friends or even just acquaintances, who he always made feel important. To me, achieving this kind of balance is what defines a “successful” life.
Today more than ever, it is easy to lose sight of the immeasurable value that each day holds and the pricelessness of the people we spend those days with. Our family. Our friends. Our co-workers. Yes, we face a challenging economy and uncertain times. Yes, technological evolution has enabled, and as a result, required us to fit more tasks into fewer hours, often for less money, raising the bars for efficiency and production to ever higher levels.
But at the end of each day, or more appropriately, at the beginning– we owe it to ourselves to pause and reflect on the things that truly matter in this life. We are not guaranteed tomorrow. We are not even guaranteed our next breath. So, if you wish to live a life with no regrets, the kind of life that Stephen George William Parker lived, then don’t wait on it to come to you. Go out and grab it. At home. At work. On the beach. And remember to always do it without losing sight of the important people around you. You never know when they’ll be gone. Steve, we will miss you.
Beautifully expressed…and lived, Tim.
Thank you! This is a wonderful recap of Stephen & his memorial. From Stephen’s Sister in Law, Ashley
Thank you Tim, this completely touched me…what a wonderful message. I know that Stephen would be so proud to see this in his honor.
Lovely sentiments that ring true.
Tim, you said it all to a T! We are all blessed for the time we had with Stephen. Thank you for sharing the message we all know, but that you put into words brilliantly.
I trust that his soul will rest in peace and that a merciful God will watch over all of us forever!
We Love you Stephen…you will be missed sorely but you will live on in our souls till we meet again!
That was so heart warming and brought tears to my eyes!!! Perfectly said and thank you for sharing.
Cindy / All,
Thanks, I greatly admired and strongly related to Stephen, as so many others obviously did, as well. I think that’s a clear testament to what kind of human being he was. His memorial was truly inspirational and you could not have honored him in a more perfect way. My prayer is that you, your girls and the entire Parker family will rally from this immense loss, closer and stronger than ever. I know that you will. That’s the mold that Stephen and all of the Parker family were unmistakably cut from.
Best Regards,
Tim
You know those moments of perfection when music touches your soul and provokes profound feelings? Well, I think this may just have encapsulated quite a few of the emotions that I have been feeling. Thank you for sharing your experiences, thoughts and heart. I know that somewhere Stephen is smiling and probably moving the hair out of his face…
Naomi (aka Stephen’s “sister”)
Thank you for such a touching tribute. Stephen was a joy!
Thank you so much Tim for your thoughtful words and insights. We all march on in this life with great purpose…but sometimes we forget to look around and breath in the sights and experiences along the way. Stephen always looked around…he saw, and he created, the joy and wonders around him and those in his life. Stephen will forever be embodied in our hearts and memories and he has added to this life of ours…it is fuller because of him. It is richer and more meaningful. He taught us not only to look but to see. And for that, we are all grateful.
What a lovely tribute. A facebook friend, Susan Robin Sorrell posted the link to this. I hear it, and I’m paying attention. Much love to all his family and his friends.
Wow !!! Appropriatly Poignant.. Although I know Steven’s parents well, I had only had the pleasure of Steven’s company on perhaps 12 occasions. You said it so well and I will remember him for the impact he had on so many people that he knew only briefly.
God will bless Steven and his family and we should all try to emulate Steven’s attitude toward life and Family…
Mike Ricciardelli and Joan Honsberger
Stephen touched so very many people’s lives and hearts. His spirit was so warm and loving that it will surely stay that way even after his passing and will keep near to us. All my love goes out to Stephen’s amazing family.
Wow, I am speechless. This is truly a fitting tribute to Stephen, if there could ever be one that is. We all loved and respected him and the amazing person that he was. He is missed already so much. He is loved. He has always been loved. And to me, the most amazing thing about Stephen is that he loved in return. No matter what, Stephen shared his love with his family, friends, and to anyone who needed it. How fortunate we all are to have had a part in his life. I am blessed to have known Stephen Parker, I will never forget “little brother” and the sweet memories. RIP Stephen, I love you.
I appreciate everyone’s comments, and have enjoyed reading your reflections on Stephen. I know most of you were even closer to him then myself, and your loss, great. I knew Stephen primarily on a professional basis and enjoyed every opportunity to work with him and his family. As I shared with Parker family friend George Breedon the other day, I related very strongly to Steve for a variety of reasons. Like Steve, I also have two young daughters; hail from a close-knit family of all boys (3 brothers); and one that worked together in the local real estate industry for many years. Stephen and I were also the same age (I’m just 10 weeks older); both travel and ocean nuts; and guitar players (although I don’t presume to be as skilled as he was). But beyond all these unusual commonalities, what I really loved most about Stephen was what is clear that everyone loved about him. He was just a really good person, who never took himself or life too seriously. As I related to George, he obviously had an incredibly positive impact on everyone who knew him and left behind a real “ripple effect”. There’s not much more we can ask for in this life than that.